Riku is to flawless as picture is to skin problems
by therichnobody
Summary: As the title says, it's Picture Day in Twilight High, and something pops up. suck at summaries


Inspired by...me. I had a pimple once and well...al least it wasn't as near bad as this.

Since Riku doesn't want to talk to me after the yaoi I did with him and Zexion, I'll just reveal his little secret, which is-

Riku:NO! I'll talk to you! I'll be your bestest friend! You don't have to do that, come on...we're buddies, right?!  
(evil smirk) I can do this story and you must continue to be my loyal friend?  
Riku: Yeah, just promise me you'll de-gayify Sora like you promised.

I will.

Riku: Heh, cool. Enjoy the story guys-(looks at the above sentence) What can a pimple inspire you to write-Oh no...

--------X-------X-------

"Riku, you're going to be late...Riku...Riku! I know you hear me."

_Please, just five more minutes..._

"Get up young man, up! You gotta get up, gotta go!"

_Unhhh..._

Riku's mother wasn't going to let up. She kept nudging him, until finally she ripped the sheets from him, exposing his body to the morning chill. Riku shivered, groping for the cover but she wouldn't give it to him. He groaned. _Might as well get up._

He sat up, shivering, sastifying his mother. She shook her head on the other hand, "You wouldn't be so cold if you didn't go to sleep shirtless. What happened to the pajamas you aunt gave you?"

"Mom, they were two sizes too big, still had the kiddie feet attached to them, and it was little black and pink rabbits on them." 

"They were cute! Now get ready for school, Sora said he was coming by to pick you up."

"I can walk."

"No, you're riding with Sora. Don't want him to come for no reason, do you?" and she left on that.

Riku sighed. _Sora going to do nothing but invade my room, looking for some more pictures, making us both late. Wait, that reminds me, today's Picture Day..._

The teen dragged himself to the bathroom, took a quick shower, and looked in the mirror. He looked at his hair. It was a mess, all skewn over the place. He picked up a brush to tame his hair back to its original loveliness(not that he's narcisstic or anything, it's 'cause I think he's HOT) but dropped the brush in the sink at the horror he saw on his face. He raised a shaking hand to his face and poked his face to assure himself it was there, actually hoping it wasn't. It was.

"NOOOOOOOOOOOOO!!!"

A pimple, full of oily pus protuding from in the direct middle of his nose. The base of it was flaming red, with a white head to it, as if it was throbbing. His eye twitched, his hands shook with fear, skin pale, accenting the evil blemish even more. He wimpered as he poked it, feeling the oil escape from the zit and onto his finger. "Nooo, why today, I never had a zit in my life..." Riku couldn't believe it, he always kept his skin in great condition, damn near perfect condition! How could he get a pimple...

"Riku, are you ready? Sora's already here!"

"What?! No I am NOT ready!!" Riku yelled to his mother, now frantic. "I can't go to school like this! No way! I'm faking sick"-

"I can hear you! You are going, now hurry up!"

The silver-haired teen wasn't really listening to his mother, he was trying to pop the pimple. But all his efforts in squeezing it to death only made it bigger. "Noooo, you're supposed to go away, not get bigger...you are not cooperating!"

knock knock.

He looked at the door, dreading even coming out. "Yo Riku, what are you doing in there? Remember, you're not supposed to drown in the shower." There was only one person who would say something like that. 

"Sora, I'm...tell my mom I'm sick. I ain't coming out!" He was still trying desprately to get rid of it. (now using tweezers)

"Huh? You're sick? What's wr"- But Sora was cut off from a loud yell of pain coming from the bathroom. "Riku, what are you doing?!" 

Now his face was bleeding, not by the pimple popping, but by Riku pinching the skin around it too hard. Adding the fact that it was still growing, he wasn't coming out of the bathroom. There wasn't anything that could get him out.

Sora burst in. "Riku, why are you still in here?"

_How could I forget to lock the door?_

"Sora get out!" He pushed him out but Sora turned back around and put his massive shoe in the door. "Now what the heck is going on?" 

Riku was shrinking behind the door, covering his nose. He knew he'd have to come out now. He took a deep breath and slowly said, "If I show you, promise you won't laugh. 'Cause if you do..."

"I won't laugh! We're friends, what would I laugh"- Riku showed him his face invader. Sora's eyes widened, mouth twitched, then curled into a smile, then he couldn't hold it in. He laughed and couldn't stop. Riku slammed the bathroom door yelling out so many swear words, of course making his mother coming up to see what was taking them. This went on for another ten minutes, Sora laughing, Riku not coming out and still yelling, his mother yelling right along with him, grouding him, and whatnot. Eventually the two got to school, late, Riku grouded, still had a zit the size of a beachball(according to Sora) which he tried to cover up with a band-aid. Right now, he was mapping out his day, trying to avoid all of the fangirls and narssictic boys at school untill fourth period, where he was thinking of a way to avoid taking the picture. All the while, Sora kept laughing, Kairi kept whispering old folk remedies for pimple removal but stopped and tried to stop Sora with his comparisons, and the said pimple was getting bigger and bigger.

"I swear, that thing it the size of my eraser."

"Sora, you're not helping! Besides, it's more the size of a marble."

"Yeah, you're right. One of those big shooting marbles."

"Either that or the size of your big toe."

"No...it's bigger than that. I can see it, it's growing too big for the band-aid. See, it looks like it's oozing from the sides."

"Where? Oh, gross! It's like a giant red eyeball looking at me or something"-

"Leave me alone!!!"

"Mr. Akebane, volume. (bell rings) Alright, forth period is cancelled due to the pictures. Remember, no caps, hats or anything you hormone-crazed teens use to cover up your misfortunes."

-------X---------X-------

"Seriously Riku, that band-aid isn't doing anything but making it look bigger."

"What am I going to do?!" Riku was a wreck. "I have to pop it."

"No, that's only going to leave a black spot"-

"Better than a volcano"-

"Sora!"

The three were already in the line waiting for their pictures to be taken. Kairi was first.

"Don't leave me..."

"It'll be fine. It's just a picture, what can that do?"

"You do know these are going into the yearbook, right Kairi?" 

"Oh... ... ...Glad I don't have one."

Minutes tick by, Sora won't stop comparing Riku's blemish with large and obscene things, Riku won't stop poking it, making it redder, bigger, and letting more pus fill its already bloated crevase. Then it was Sora's turn.

"Just pop it, either that or have it pop during the photo. Don't want that to happen, do you?"

_nooooo..._

And then it was Riku's turn. He kept the band-aid on and didn't pop it due to Sora's protests. He slowly walked to the photo room, dreading the event as if it was his funeral. He kept a hand clasped over his nose, just in case. He slowly crept up on the stool where he had to sit, and waited on the cameraman. He could feel the evil thing pulsing on his face, quaking due to the pressure building up under his skin, just ever breaking the surface, leaking the disgusting yellowish-green pus, letting it trickle down his nose. It was mocking him, knowing he couldn't do a thing about it. Ever growing, itching to burst; pus and some other oily liquid being devoured and stored by this voracious monstrocity blocking the clogged pore, as if it was this obese food-deprived red sumo(mind you, it was the sumo among pimples, according to Riku) It was so immense now he could feel it on his hand that was covering it, just a moment ago there was at least a centimeter of space seprating it. But now it is-

"Young man, could you remove your hand? I knew it. Pimple, right? There's always one of them in each photo shoot. Come on, it can't be that bad."

Riku stared at the cameraman as if he was this brainless. He slowly moved his hand from his face.

"And the band-aid."

"It might get infected."

"No it won't. Take it off."

Riku reluctantly peeled off the band-aid and closed his eyes, the thing jiggling slightly,awaiting a bloodcurdling scream, but it didn't come.

"That...isn't...well I can't say it's small." The cameraman ducked behind the camera, prepared to take the shot, and said, "Smile!" 

Riku didn't smile. He was staring at the red celluite-infected unicorn horn growing from his face, quivering, twitching, building up it's immense gooey arsenal for an eruption. And in a split second, the picture was taken-

Just as the zit erupted. Yellow-greenish gooey pus ejaculated from the head of the pimple, spraying all over Riku's shirt, pants, the lens and the hair of the cameraman. The whitehead that was clogging it twirled out like a thick beige, slimy streamer with the tip of it graying. It flew and landed on the floor right in front of the line where the rest of the students were waiting to take their pictures. Several girls screamed, Sora fell out of his chair laughing. But Riku was scrambling to go crawl under a rock. The thing was still shooting out the thick, oily, goopy pimple juice. He couldn't stem the flow. He could feel it building up more of its ammo, ready to unload it all over anyone and anything. He didn't care. He ran all the way home, never to show his face again.

Not.

-------X---------X-------

_Two days later_

"Hey, we got our pictures back!" Sora exclaimed, waving the envelope in the air.

"I got mine back too! Lemme see!...Oh Sora, you're picture's cool! I wonder why the boys got different background than the girls?" 

"Don't know Kairi, but where's Riku? The pimple's gone, I think."

"I saw him when he got his pictures a while ago." 

"Let's go to his house and go talk to him!"

"You just want to see his pictures!" 

The two laughed as they walked up to Riku's home, where they saw him in the backyard looking at the ground.

"Hey Riku! Where are you pic"-

"They're in the trash." he said sourly.

"Oh come on, I know your mom wouldn't let you throw them all away. Let us see, we won't laugh"-

"Yeah you will."

"Nuh-uh. The worst Kairi will do is scream her head off and faint. Ha ha!"

Riku glared at Sora before shoving the photo in his face. "Go ahead, laugh."

"Ow, you didn't have to be so mean about it." Both Kairi and Sora looked at Riku's photo and saw-

Riku's picture was taken right at the point of eruption. He was looking at his accursed blemish as the end of it was shooting out the runny liquid. Trust me, not a pretty picture.

Maybe that's why he destroyed it with a dark aura blast as soon as Sora and Kairi dropped it from their mad laughing fits.

--------X---------X--------

Why is that my new border? I don't know. But the guys at Radioshack do. (couldn't resist)

Yes, I know I use the word 'ejaculated', I thought it was appropiate at the time.

Same ol' disclaimer applies: If you think I own Kingdom Hearts you must be OUT CHO' MIND!

Review please! It was meant to be funny, but Riku is sulking in a corner, muttering something about I cursed him to have a pimple-riddled face or something like that. He still loves me though.

Bye now! (waves all cool like)


End file.
